I work shift work, so I sometimes sleep at strange times. I was sleeping this afternoon, in fact, when most normal people are out there doing normal daytime things. I had a really good nap, which is nice, because I work a 12 hour overnight shift tonight.
When I woke up, I had a missed call from a strange number on my phone. And as per usual, before I even listened to the voicemail, I Googled it, to see if I could identify the source. Aaaaaaaand it came back to the fertility clinic we’ve been referred to!
Listened to the voicemail (which just said my name and the doctor’s name and left a callback number) and called them back immediately, and got voicemail. Sad face! And now I am afraid to get in the shower, because I might miss their call back. Which is crazy, right? If I miss it, I will just have to talk to them tomorrow. Which isn’t the end of the world. Except that every time we make any sort of progress in our journey to parenthood, I am almost incapacitated by an incredible urge to hit a mystical fast-forward button, to jump ahead to a baby in my arms. And then it’s just too hard to breathe.
I am going to stop sitting here staring at my phone now, because I just looked on their website, and their office closed over an hour ago. It’s safe to have a shower now, right? Right. And also, I need to remember how to breathe again.